…on his face.
The Bears are 3-0, the only NFC team that can say that. There’s only two other teams in the entire league that can say that. Say what you want about the Chiefs, but the Steelers certainly are legit, and they don’t even have their quarterback yet.
The key to the Bears’ season, whether they make a deep playoff run or not, has nothing to do with the Tampa 2, Jay Cutler, or Juilus Peppers.
Nope, it has nothing to do with Devin Hester returning punts, Tommie Harris being inactive, or Mike Martz’s 400-page playbook.
Lovie Smith needs to grow a mustache, and fast.
Any coach that has won a championship in this town, going back to 1985, has had hair on his upper lip.
It all started with Da Coach with Da Bears in 1985. Ditka’s mustache was the most legendary facial hair in the city for a long time, and he’s still rockin’ the ‘stache to this day.
Then came Phil Jackson’s turn with the Bulls, beginning in 1991. The younger version of Phil Jackson had very curly hair, and a full mustache as well. Even though he’s proven you can win without a mustache, he won in Chicago while wearing his ‘stache. It’s obvious that Michael Jordan and Scottie Pippen drew their ability from Jackson’s facial hair, and used it to win six titles.
In 2005, even Ozzie Guillen was sporting a little bit of a mustache in his goatee. Not many teams can go through the entire baseball playoffs winning all but one game. It’s obviously because of Ozzie’s look. Of course, they haven’t won a title since, so maybe Ozzie should grow a fuller mustache to bring back the magic.
Finally, this winter and summer, the Blackhawks translated the best Chicago sports mustache in history into their first Stanley Cup championship in nearly 40 years. Obviously, facial hair and the Stanley Cup Playoffs go hand in hand, but Joel Quenneville had that ‘stache full and bushy from day one. You can even tell that he has a mustache by hearing him speak in his pregame interview on WGN Radio. I wouldn’t want to be an NHL official, either. When he isn’t happy with a call, he isn’t afraid to let the officials know, and his mustache only makes him that much more intimidating.
So, Lovie…what are you waiting for? This is clearly a make or break year for you, so you should be doing everything in your power to make sure you have a job next year. It obviously doesn’t matter how full your mustache is, but clearly, in order to win the Super Bowl, you’ll be needing that ‘stache.